I seem to be all over...

I seem to be all over the place. I can't seem to decide if I want to work in watercolors, colored pencils,or work on my Chinese brush technique. I guess I'm having at the moment self doubt about my ability to create. I keep on asking myself, why do I create? Is it a need or a desire? Do I paint or draw because I have too? I think so. Even when I'm not drawing or painting, I'm thinking about art. What will be my next piece? What do I want to learn from the process? What direction do I want to take? And a hundred more questions fill my mind. Originally when I first started to learn how to paint in watercolors...I wanted to paint a realistic portrait of my Cavalier King Charles Spaniel...Bella. That was the beginning. Since then I've painted several portraits of my dogs. Some are good, some are OK. I'm really trying to draw free hand without the help of a grid. The colored pencil drawing of "Oliver" the Dachshund is a drawing I did freehand yesterday. I'm not happy with the way the drawing came out. Something seems to be missing. I wanted a likeness and I wanted his proportions to be right. Then I had problems trying to achieve the correct coloring of Oliver. It's when I get frustrated with the outcome, I become unsure of my ability. So after looking at Oliver for a while I decided to put him aside and work on something else.







I thought I'd try my hand at rendering a glass piece done in colored pencil. This drawing went a little better and I'll probably sketch it again and try painting it in watercolor.